Gross.

There is no other word to describe what I was forced to watch as a Yankee fan this weekend. Just BRUTAL. No pitching, no offense, and I got to watch that d-bag K-Rod celebrate like he just closed Game 7 not once, but TWICE. Act like you been there, guy.

PS - To all of my Mets fan friends: RELAX. Good for you for taking 2 of 3 from a superior team. But let's get one thing straight - your team is flat out not good. Johan is solid, and it looks like Mike Pelfrey has put it together. That leaves 60% of your rotation that is dogshit. Your star third baseman strikes out like there's an incentive in is contract tied to it. Jose Reyes makes horrific decisions on the bases. Jeff Franceour's head is so far up his own rectum at the plate that he's wearing himself as a hat.

PPS - I hate K-Rod with the heat of 1,000 suns. It makes me smile when his newly acquired chubby face dryhumps a fastball to the plate at 89 MPH.

FML

The Yankees have now played so poorly that I am embarrassed to tell people what I do here at TFB. Last night as I was watching Tommy Hanson impact the Yankees collective colon, I was doing some site work from my iPhone. When someone asked me what I was doing, I told them that I ran a human trafficking ring in Cambodia.

As the MSM continues to makes excuses for these players, this manager, and this organization, it is left to the people like me to tell it how it is. This team is not good. Jorge Posada should be over his injury. Alex Rodriguez should be playing better baseball, regardless if he is overworked or not. Joe Girardi should be eating more salmon or something because he needs to be sharper. Mark Teixeira needs to start playing like Mark Teixeira again (luv him!!!1!!!!!1!!). Derek Jeter needs to refill his Valtrex, because it seems his herpes are effecting him to the point that he can't beat out a goddamned double play ball.

Of course, all of this comes to a head on a night when the Red Sox do exactly what they are supposed to do and beat the Nats. As much as we like to despise Boston on this site, that is what good teams do. They take games from the Nationals. They take games from the Marlins. And surely, they do not get shut out in the first game of what could be a momentum-building series before playing at Shiti Field for three games this weekend.

Aaaaaawwwwwwww!!!!

I posted this picture because a cute puppy is a lot nicer to think about than the fact that the Red Sox are now 5-0 against the Yankees, the bullpen is a mess and Jorge Posada is out for a month. Enjoy.

**BREAKING NEWS**: Yankees Swept in Boston

I am not sure if anyone noticed, but the Yankees were embarrassed in three straight games this weekend against the Boston Red Sox.

I have received numerous emails reprimanding me for not having done a write up on the series, and maybe the readers have a point. Facts being facts, though, The Fowl Balls has never been a "news driven" site, and if you don't know how/why the Yankees got their rectums impacted this weekend, then maybe you have stumbled upon this site by accident. Without further adieu, here is the Official TFB review of this weekend's series.

Game 1 -
Mariano Rivera caught the "suck flu" from others in the locker room, and blows a two run lead with two outs in the ninth by giving up a home run to Jason Bay. In all fairness, it should have never come to that situation as the Yanks blew a bases-loaded, none out opportunity just two innings before.

Game 2 -
It was A.J Burnett's time to crap himself as he let up 8 earned runs, including a grand slam to Jason Varitek, who proceeded to sprint around the bases like like a Little Leaguer. Speaking of Little League mannerisms, Mike Lowell and his 10 year old bat wiggle helped pound the Yankees into submission as well, plating like 47 runs all by himself. Robinson Cano continued his early domination of the league, albeit in a losing effort.

Game 3 -
This marked the third consecutive game that the team blew a lead. Andy Pettitte battled, but looked like a rookie as Jacoby Ellsbury stole home on the aging lefty. Justin Masterson had the Yankees sputtering all night, followed by two pitchers that nobody has ever heard of shutting down what is supposed to be a dominant offense.

I hope that this makes you all happy. The Yankees look awful, and not only am I forced to watch the games, now I am expected to write about it? My readers suck.